Stacey & Hy on the Fly

Woman Fly Fishing Angler wading in mountain river

You probably think I'm going to tell you that I was healed at the moment my foot hit the water and I cast my line.. but I wasn't.

As the water washed around my feet, I took a cleansing breath and soaked in the good vibes of nature - who, unlike earth's human inhabitants, was behaving as it should - in the perfect rhythm of a symphony written by the hand of God himself. I recall the thought coming to my mind that I was meant to be there and I needed this more than I had realized. 

Hyrum handed me the rod and told me where and how to cast the line to land the fish he knew frequented the area of his favorite spot. I cast the line once. It rolled out in front of me. I pulled it back, then forward - expecting it to roll out again and land in the spot I'd intended. Instead, there was a tree just behind and above me that had claimed my fly.  Patiently, as always, Hyrum released it of the bond and set me casting again. The same thing happened. He broke off the dead twigs that proved to be a problem and again I tried, focusing on my backcast to only have my fly snag the tree in front of me - now ruining the spot I was trying to catch the fish in, because Hyrum would have to wade through it to untangle the nest of line from the shrub.

"Maybe you should just fish." I said, frustratedly...

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On New Years Eve, our family talked over the dinner of Tamales we bought from a local small (really small) business. The topic I introduced was all about the year we were about to emerge from. As you know, it...
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I am not, by definition, a keeper of all things in their places, analytical type. But there was a time, where I thought different groups of friends should be kept separately and some things shouldn't mix - like salt on watermelon. Along this same line of thinking, I believed that fishing trips had to be separated from family vacations in order to have quality time. Surely some of this thinking must have come from my prior experiences and the belief systems I had developed as a result. Most definitely, I tried to keep fishing separated from family time, because Hyrum was so obsessed with fishing - and my reluctance to have our vacations become sitting by a river, undoubtedly made him feel he would be missing out.  We'd leave the fly gear at home and he'd look longingly at the rivers we'd pass on the way from places like Portland to the coast. 
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My husband and fly-fishing go hand in hand. I swear to you that he will be wheeled into a river in a wheel-chair as a feeble old man, if that's what it takes to keep him fishing up until the last minute of his life. We've seriously talked about how to fulfill this need for him, should he ever become incapacitated.. you might think I'm kidding, but I'm not. He needs it and he breathes it. Some people dream in color – he dreams in fishing. He's actually been upset for a day because I woke him from a fantastic fishing dream.. 
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